Sickness and Powder - essentials for laughter

So I've always been told that I'm a terrible writer because everything that I write sounds exactly how I talk...and apparently that's not a good thing.  Oh well.  I think that it's important for anyone that might read this to read it like I would say it because it'll be funnier that way.  Because my life...you can't make it up.

For example...we'll talk about my work first.  I went to college, I hated every minute of it because it got in the way of me making money, but I went, because it's what you are supposed to do.  Then I went back to college and got my MBA, because that's what you are supposed to do.  Hated that too.  But it was supposed to mean that I would be making all of this money which is how I thought I should judge my success.  Fail.  I like my job, sometimes more than others.  Some days, I feel like I'm running a daycare for dysfunctional children who are all waiting on their IEPs to get their lives right.  I've never met more people less motivated in money and more motivated to complain about how much their lives suck because they don't make more money.  Guess what?  If you aren't on salary, your hourly rate is a mute point when you don't SHOW UP FOR WORK.  I mean...how are these people sick so often?  The number of times someone calls in sick is ridiculous to me...one would think they should be at the doctor getting checked out for leukemia or colon cancer or something because I know I would be if I was that sick all the time.  Funny how that works...they don't even go to the doctor when they are too sick to work...they are LAZY.  They aren't sick.  They are just L-A-Z-Y!  I don't know how lazy people get their bills paid because the bill collectors aren't lazy.  At least mine aren't anyway.  UGH.

When I hang out with one of my territory reps for products that we use at work...they always ask me to tell them about my employees because I always have funny stories.  I don't actually know if they are funny stories or if it's the way I tell the story with such passion and annoyance...like the other day...when I had to tell a girl that she smells terrible.  TERRIBLE.  And that I could fry chicken with the grease in her hair.  She doesn't seem to care because she still stinks.  So I constantly think about showing her the videos that I found from the Meat Ministries.  She needs POWDER.  Errrwhere.

Another example of the crazy is the girl that has dedicated her whole life to Harry Potter.  Harry Freaking Potter.  But she hasn't even read all of the books.  She just watched the movies.  And tattooed her entire leg for Harry.  Harry Potter.  What happens one day when Harry Potter isn't cool anymore?  I mean...hasn't that time arrived anyway?  But then again, I guess you should know that I don't just judge Harry Potter tattoos - I judge lots of tattoos...because old wrinkly saggy tattoos sound disgusting to me.

I could go on and on about these people that I work with and how much they entertain me...but I'll save more stories for a different post.  We can't have all of our laughs in the first post...you'd never come back and read any others.

Onto my next topic for today: life.

Wow that's broad.  But it's so hard to figure out what you want to do with life sometimes - being an adult is really lame sometimes.

I'll tell you all about the choices I'm trying to make:

1. I want to be a personal shopper for someone famous.  But see...there are some problems...first problem - I don't know anyone famous. Second problem - I don't know where to find a famous person that would like me to do their shopping when I wear jeans and a tshirt almost any chance I get.  Problems.  UGH.

2. I need to finish my certification to be a Certified Wedding Planner.  But there's a problem with this too.  I need a friend to let me be their wedding planner but I don't know any friends that might get married sometime soon - other than my little chicken but she wants to get married at the courthouse - low key.

3.  On days that I really need a change from my job...I think about going back to college.  But then I think...what career do I really want and will it really pay me enough (reminder: I'm all about the money) to be worth the massive student loans that would come from it.  Doctorate in business so I can teach?  Do I really want to teach collegiate classes?  Am I smart enough to teach collegiate classes?  Masters in regular high school education?  Do I really want a paycut with more student loans all to get my summers off?  Why won't these companies that I really really really want to work for want to hire me without "sales experience"?  Rude.  I have more sales experience than they know...I just don't know how to articulate it well enough to lure them. 

4. I want to be near my niece.  Who wants to give me a job that I want, not working weekends, making decent money that puts me near my niece?  SHOW ME THE MONEY.

And the powder.  Powder is important. 

It's Christmas Time

OMG! I cannot believe it's almost Christmas - this year has FLOWN by. Thankfully I got started with my Christmas shopping earlier than normal - and I'm almost finished! I need to buy my dad and little brother one more thing each, and a present for my secret santa person @ work but then I'm done!

I've decorated my house from the kitchen towels, to lights in the windows, to garland out front, to my cute little tree and stockings on the mantle. Sadly enough, it's all for me to enjoy since I live alone...but that's ok. I like it. I don't typically decorate this much but I wanted to this year.

I'm excited about the presents that I've been buying this year, they are fun and not expected which makes them even more fun.

Some friends from high school are coming to town today to hang out and shop and it'll get great to see them as I haven't seem them lately. One is married with a kid, one has a live in boyfriend and will be getting a ring soon to get engaged. It's great!

Ok well gotta get ready to go out and finish some school work. Later.

100 Random Things about me

I saw where someone did this and I thought I'd try it but I think I need to divide it up...but we'll see how it goes.

1. I am obsessed with the color green.
2. I wear an 8.5 shoe.
3. I am the 2nd of 4 children.
4. I'm a texture eater.
5. I spend money like crazy.
6. I struggle to say no.
7. I like all music.
8. I miss playing the trumpet.
9. My favorite food is ribs.
10. I love chocolate.
11. I want to live in a different country.
12. I think about quitting my job at least 1 day a week.
13. I remember numbers. Like almost every phone number I've ever dialed.
14. I like mowing my yard.
15. I hate my car.
16. I tap dance.
17. I'm country.
18. I'm independent.
19. I hate it when people spend money on me.
20. I struggle to stay awake when it's dark and I turn on a movie.
21. I don't like hot liquids.
22. I won't eat soup because it's a hot liquid.
23. I have 2 dogs that drive me insane.
24. I have 1 dog that is my best friend.
25. I manage a veterinary clinic.
26. I'm in grad school and I hate it.
27. I'm envious of my little sister.
28. I love pickles.
29. I love to bake.
30. I hate ironing.

Ok, so I only got to 30 - I'll work on it again soon.
Gotta go to bed so that I can get up for work tomorrow.

Year in Review

So this year has been one roller coaster after another so I thought I'd review what's happened...

Finally decided I know what is expected of me at work. Makes things easier by far.
Enjoyed reconnecting with a long lost friend.
Traveled to Raleigh a lot.
Lost a best friend because she owes me 1600 dollars.
Losing her also meant I was losing a roommate - I let people walk all over me to a point.
Had a major car issues...1400 in June....1300 in August. Currently, not air, no defrost, no heater. Need to blow the car up.
Crazy drama with another friend due to an inability to get along with the significant other.
Picked up another friend along the way, it's complicated though, she works for me.
Didn't travel as much as I'd like...I'll have to work on that in 2009.
Did get to see grams, Texas, Atlanta more times than I can count, the beach, and reunite with a friend from 20 years ago.
I must say that this is a year I wouldn't be sad if I never thought about again. That's sad to say but oh well.
Thanksgiving wasn't what I planned but not all plans work out.
Christmas should be entertaining to say the least.
And maybe, just maybe, I'll stay away until 12 this year on New Years Eve. I typically fall asleep early =) !